Friday, July 27, 2012


If you call yourself a Christian I hope you are a Christ follower.
If you are a Christ follower I hope you  know you are a Disciple
I hope you know Disciple ultimately means you are a  learner
I hope you are learning from His Word and being humbly obedient to what you are learning
I hope you know what you are following so you know where it is you are leading
And I hope you know you are leading

I hope I am learning all this myself 

Sunday, May 20, 2012


I look at the title of this blog.....
1st thing i read this morning:
Romans 12:2 'Do not conform any longer to the patterns of this world, BUT be transformed by the RENEWING of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is- His good, pleasing and perfect will.

2nd thing...Isaiah 13:6 Wail! God's day of judgement is near- an avalanche crashing down from the Strong God.

6 verses and I stop
Revelation of character
I am a daughter of Christ and I in front of my 9 year old Granddaughter called my daughter a 'bitch'. In fun I can justify. Why can i call it silly or fun or cute to do that?
I am thinking this morning about my 'words'.
I say, I love Jesus
I prove w/my ACTIONS and words, over and over- I am that in name only.
I am sorry Father and I am sorry Emma Grace, my first precious Gift from God Granddaughter.
I am sorry.
I will- run into Your Grace filled arms and not wallow in this or talk about it ad nauseum AND I will from now on, in remembering Romans and my mantle of 'daughter' watch my words and focus on You.
I will never call anyone a 'bitch' again and obediently listen before I speak all the while remembering Your love and Grace for all and spend the rest of my life listening to Your Spirit guide my words - prayerfully into discussion and LISTENING to them for openings to have those discussions where THEY are searching and that could potentially bring THEM into a knowing of YOU, Your Son, Your Grace.
I am sorry Emma.

Monday, May 7, 2012

April 2012

Wow April was an amazing month this year.
Papa and I married 35 years.
2 weeks in LA with Dara, Juno and Nehe.....trying to serve Dara as she allowed a new lil one to settle into her womb....yep #6 on the way.
Traveling through the SW w/Papa seeing country so beautiful as to take you breath away.
Riding behind Papa praying....
Getting up in the morning and reading the Word, trying to learn about becoming a Disciple of Christ, desiring with my heart to be about Him and others, all others. It's so against my natural, this praying to be led always by the Supernatural. I don't know what's next. I pray that knowing the desires of my heart He is changing me. I pray to become more and more about Him and live a life that shows who I know, who I follow, who I obey.
I will this day be prayerful and obedient. To, in that obedience not miss anything that He is showing me, leading me to.

Wednesday, March 28, 2012

Mark 8

Jesus rebuking Peter: " You do not have in mind the things of God, but merely human concerns."

Moving....packing up 28 years of stuff....going back to a place I ran away from.....leaving the most dearest here....I want to be obedient to You. I want to be sure it's the right thing. How can I know??

Holding on to what Joshua told the people, LOWHS

Love You
Obey You
Walk with You
Hold tight to You
Joshua 22:5

Monday, March 26, 2012


It doesn't take much reading of the Bible to see where we are broken...

No , I take that back, it takes a bit of time to read and digest this amazing book to see how and where we are broken. It doesn't take much just looking around, REALLY honestly looking around to see we are broken.
It's the honestly looking around that is key. See we are all so personally broken that we have lost what real honesty is, ok I have. It is only in having this amazing relationship with Christ that I have seen, can keep seeing how far from being honest I am. And I wager a guess that it is a common occurence in this human race.

But to make this personal I will keep it at how far from honest I have And that I cannot write 'have been', makes me really sad and yet...keeps me needing to be swimming in His Grace and that I can, simply stuns me over and over again.

Right now this story of Trayvon Martin, breaks my heart. That it is having to be told and dissected and that his poor family have found themselves not only suffering his loss but are in the middle of such a turbulent story line. A story with real characters and being told by just as real characters. A story being bandied about in defense of and criticized for making it a racial issue. We are such a broken world. The pain we inflict on each other is unbelievable and that sometimes we don't know that pain we inflict with our opinions is evidence of the brokenness. We see color and if you deny that, I have a feeling there is a whole lot more you are not in touch with, honest about. We see it....I do, have and so wish I didn't. I so wish it wasn't the first thing I notice. Quickly on the heels of that is attractiveness, the shallowness with which i operate shames me, no longer surprises me. Again I wish I didn't. What I can claim though is that now with Christ I don't stop there, not even long enough to make a judgment.....God I hope that's true and somehow as I write it claiming Christ I think it is. I have a bi-racial grandson, Nehemiah with the most beautiful caramel skin. With a Haitian Daddy and a white Momma, he is one of our passel of Grands.
I see color and attractiveness and swimming in Grace just needed because of said confession i become curious. He is making me more and more curious and for that I am grateful. He is humbling me to a place of needing to be swimming in Grace and making me curious.....How do I

Monday, March 19, 2012

Joshua 1:9

Holding onto this verse today.......maybe you need it too.

9 Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go.”

Saturday, March 17, 2012


There are decisions looming....
I want desperately to follow wherever it is You lead as long as it's not back...
A lot of times tho You refer to a turning a yielding....a submitting.

So now I Abraham giving You what I so desperately want to keep. It feels very hopeless and yet...Deuteronomy 31:8 says 8 The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.”

Thursday, March 1, 2012

From a 'Walker' to Alive in Christ

I know you all are too young to watch Walking Dead and yet this is my only place to share:)

"Walkers" are Zombies. Well first off confession..i LOVE the Walking Dead. There it's out, Gigi is a, well I am hooked on the show.

It's about a time where there is an apocalyptic event, where in this 'virus' has invaded the earth. A virus where people die and then undergo the process of becoming Zombies/Walkers. Walkers are those whose bodies have died and their brains, parts of their brains underwent this change and now are the Walking Dead. With no thots other than survival. Will leave the how of survival to your own imagination or research on Zombies.

in the first season, those who somehow survived the 'virus' are together and working towards survival themselves. living in a world of Walkers who need the living to survive. They make their way to the Center for Disease control in Atlanta and come into the facility meeting the only survivor who has scientifically documented his wife's descent into becoming a Walker. He documents her death and then maps out the brain activity that turned her.

I feel like the reverse is true for...well for me, and that I am fighting the transference. Fighting the death of ME. or maybe it's already happened and the transference is happening and the synapses in my brain are changing......that i am coming out of the Zombie like state of walking around looking to and for my own survival into to a life of obedience, of following, of being devoted to Christ.

I don't know if this makes any sense and if anyone out there is a fan of the show and seeking Christ :/ perhaps we can dialogue about this. And together come to die so we can live.

Wednesday, January 18, 2012

I am a motorcycle rider, scratch that. My husband is a motorcycle rider and graciously allows me to accompany him on the back of the bike. ....confession...i have made a big point in our years together that THAT bike doesn't leave the driveway unless i am on the back. The gracious part stays, my husband shares his passion and talents with me with so much grace that i am overwhelmed.
confession....overwhelmd when i am not griping about simply looking at the back of his big ass helmet. yup instead of being grateful for what i see, where i have been, glorying in the freedom that sailing along on two wheels brings me i bitch at him about looking at his 'big ass helmet'. I regale him w/the frustrations of never being able to see where we are going. i piss and moan at this road or that, this beautiful piece of scenery or that with an irregular regularity. He who holds the responsiblity of my safety, his, our future, i complain to.
it has been an ongoing revelation to me that THAT is also the way i treat my Abba. He who goes before me and has my back. He who sent His son to die for me. I spend way more time complaining to Him than Thanking Him.
there are many stories i have learned from my seat on the back of the bike. now to implement all that i have learned His Grace and my husbands astounds me.

Monday, January 2, 2012

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year
these are the ones who constitute the joy of the name i get to carry of Gigi.
my prayer in 2012 is, more a word i want to focus on, learn about, carry out.DISCIPLESHIP...
webster who accepts and assists in spreading the doctrines of another..
the doctrines of Christ the Bible...He says to love Him with your whole heart and soul and strength and to love others all make disciples of men.......
i have much to learn and can only dream...pray...hope to in the journey towards full discipleship of myself to bring any and all along.....
a year of sinking myself into Obedience and the joy that comes in that struggle.